Appearing previously in the Fall 2007 edition of JMWW, here.
I’m not a ripe avocado, H told L, I won’t yield to pressure if you squeeze me in your hand. No, said L, I didn’t think you were. Avocadoes are fatty and you aren’t so in any way, he thought. But he didn’t say it. I am a mean guacamole, she once said, after a glass of wine, but meant she could make a mean guacamole. They laughed about this, and he often called her a mean guacamole for giggles, but sometimes, late at night, it wasn’t funny, and she wasn’t ripe. She looked at him funny, her eyes slicing deep. Time to stop squeezing me, her eyes said. You don’t know what’s inside. He thought of it as her mean guacamole look. But he didn’t say it. Once, while they were drinking tea on a Friday evening drenched in storm, he rubbing her socked feet, he said, do you know that domestic animals can die if they eat avocado? She looked at him funny. She, the mean guacamole. Was this squeezing, he thought, was this pressure? She was thinking, how does he know, has he killed an animal by avocado? He was thinking, I’m not an animal killer, if that’s what you’re thinking, you mean guacamole. But he didn’t say it.
I’m not a ripe avocado, H told L, I won’t yield to pressure if you squeeze me in your hand. No, said L, I didn’t think you were. Avocadoes are fatty and you aren’t so in any way, he thought. But he didn’t say it. I am a mean guacamole, she once said, after a glass of wine, but meant she could make a mean guacamole. They laughed about this, and he often called her a mean guacamole for giggles, but sometimes, late at night, it wasn’t funny, and she wasn’t ripe. She looked at him funny, her eyes slicing deep. Time to stop squeezing me, her eyes said. You don’t know what’s inside. He thought of it as her mean guacamole look. But he didn’t say it. Once, while they were drinking tea on a Friday evening drenched in storm, he rubbing her socked feet, he said, do you know that domestic animals can die if they eat avocado? She looked at him funny. She, the mean guacamole. Was this squeezing, he thought, was this pressure? She was thinking, how does he know, has he killed an animal by avocado? He was thinking, I’m not an animal killer, if that’s what you’re thinking, you mean guacamole. But he didn’t say it.
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